I fell apart, but got back up again

4:33PM - Because it's playing on my iPhone

The skies were pure and the fields were green
The sun was brighter than it's ever been
When I grew up with my best friend Kenny
We were close as any brothers than you ever knew

It was always summer and the future called
We were ready for adventures and we wanted them all
There was so much left to dream
And so much time to make it real

But I can still recall the sting of all the tears when he was gone
They said he crashed and burned
I know I'll never learn why any boy should die so young
We were racing, we were soldiers of fortune
We got in trouble but we sure got around
There are times I think I see him peeling out of the dark
I think he's right behind me now and he's gaining ground

But it was long ago and it was far away, oh God it seems so very far
And if life is just a highway, then the soul is just a car
And objects in the rear view mirror may appear closer than they are...
And objects in the rear view mirror may appear closer than they are...they are...

And when the sun descended and the night arose
I heard my father cursing everyone he knows
He was dangerous and drunk and defeated
And corroded by failure and envy and hate

There were endless winters and the dreams would freeze
Nowhere to hide and no leaves on the trees
And my father's eyes were blank as he hit me again and again and again
I know I still believe he'd never let me leave, I had to run away alone
So many threats and fears, so many wasted years before my life became my own
And though the nightmares should be over
Some of the terrors are still intact
I'll hear that ugly coarse and violent voice
And then he grabs me from behind and then he pulls me back

But it was long ago and it was far away, oh God it seems so very far
And if life is just a highway, then the soul is just a car
And objects in the rear view mirror may appear closer than they are...
And objects in the rear view mirror may appear closer than they are...
And objects in the rear view mirror may appear closer than they are...

There was a beauty living on the edge of town
She always put the top up and the hammer down
And she taught me everything I'll ever know
About the mystery and the muscle of love

The stars would glimmer and the moon would glow
I'm in the back seat with my Julie like a Romeo
And the signs along the highway all said, "Caution! Kids At Play!"
Those were the rights of spring and we did everything
There was salvation every night
We got our dreams reborn and our upholstery torn
But everything we tried was right
She used her body just like a bandage, she used my body just like a wound
I'll probably never know where she disappeared
But I can see her rising up out of the back seat now
Just like an angel rising up from a tomb

But it was long ago and it was far away, oh God it seems so very far
And if life is just a highway, then the soul is just a car
And objects in the rear view mirror may appear closer than they are...
And objects in the rear view mirror may appear closer than they are...
And objects in the rear view mirror may appear closer than they are...

11:08AM - More Skyrim thoughts

Okay, so I've been playing a lot. My character is currently 42nd level.

Biggest frustration with the game so far is loading time. Often when you transition between locations (i.e. open the main gate to leave a city) there is a transition screen, which normally has a picture from the game (like an Axe or something) and some game information ("Skyrim was initially colonised by blah"; "Holding down the power button will make your shouts more powerful"). My computer is a few years old, and so it might be that my hardware isn't up to scratch, but you can sometimes end up sitting there for 40 seconds while the new environment loads. I've taken to using this time to go and get snacks / boil the jug / hang out washing etc.

It just becomes particularly frustrating when there are two of these transitions side by side. For example, when I leave my house in Markath (Vintrel Hall), there is a transition (into Markath). Then if I want to fast travel to somewhere there's another transition. So two transitions within a few seconds of each other, meaning I can be waiting for a couple of minutes.

Fast Travel is useful though. The idea is that if you'e already discovered a location, you can simply open up your map and click on that location to travel there. Time passes in game, but it saves you to boredom of having to actually spend 20 minutes travelling normally. I find I spend a lot of time fast travelling between the main cities (all of which you can initially discover by catching a coach).

The other think that I've found is that there are just so many quests! It's at the point where I am actively avoiding getting given any more quests, as my journal is so full. Some Orc stronghold wanted me to bring them a couple of ingredients to help break their curse. Okay, no problem, I'll keep my eye open for them. But then they want me to help them go to a cave and beat up some monsters... bugger off, I've got better things to do with my time than solve all your problems.

Skills cap out at 100. I got my Blacksmithing up to that by basically making all the armour in the world. I'd go out of my way to kill animals, take their hides, tan them, and make them into armour, which I'd then sell. Blacksmithing skill increases and I get money. Win!

I also found that it starts to take way longer to level up, mainly because the skills you use the most get really high, and then you need to do so much more to increase them. With Blacksmithing already capped out, my other main skills (One Handed Weapons 89, Heavy Armour 87, Block 71) require me to hit or be hit maybe 100 times to go up. Given I normally kill opponents in two hits, it's about 25 fights to increase one of these. The temptation is to dilute my characters focus and start working to increase my lower skills. Already I've fought some easier fights using a two handed weapon (skill currently at 25) just to get some quick increases to get me closer to leveling up.

But, despite all this, I'm still loving it. I'm sure I'll get back to the main quest eventually, once I've learned a few more Dragon Shouts...

10:24AM - Superbowl XLVI

So, the football season is over for another year, with the New York Giants beating the New England Patriots in the Superbowl.

I was supporting the Patriots, partly because my friend Brad is a fan of them, and partly because I don’t like the Giants.

My dislike of the Giants goes all the way back to the early 90’s. Back then Brad re-introduced me to football. He was a fan of the Washington Redskins at the time, so it was natural I gravitated towards his team. I remember borrowing Mike Ditka’s Ultimate Football, a computer game, and playing it a lot. I remember that Brad had adjusted the stats / names of the Washington players to accurately reflect their roster (Art Monk was slow, but a good receiver... that’s about all I remember).

So naturally I opposed the other teams in the Redskins division – the hated “America’s team” Dallas Cowboys (with their “triplets” of Troy Aikman, Emmett Smith and Michael Irvin), and similarly the Giants and Eagles. I think back then there were actually 5 teams in the division (the Phoenix / Arizona Cardinals), but they were awful so I didn’t hate them quite as much.

But now my hatred is dimming. I mean, I am a huge fan of one of the Giants players (JPP!).

So I left the Superbowl with a bit of a ho-hum feeling. When you have a team and they’re not there it’s just not the same.

12:18PM - So close, no matter how far...

And so another season ends with a loss.

The Saints dug themselves a huge hole by turning the ball over 4 times in the 1st quarter (and 5 overall). They somehow managed to claw their way back into the game (thanks to SF not taking advantage of the TO's). Down by 5 (29-24) with a couple of minutes to go in the 4th quarter, they scored a touchdown (Jimmy Graham!) and a two point conversion to take a 32-29 lead with 1:40 remaining. But then the 49ers drive down the field, and score a TD with 9 seconds remaining. Game over, Saints lose 36-32.

Now our defensive co-ordinator Greg Williams is leaving. To be expected, he almost left last season, but didn't due to the sour taste in his mouth from the Seattle loss. And I think the team has tuned him out a bit. I mean, in 2009 our defence scared people because we forced turnovers. Heck, one of the most memoriable plays of that Superbowl was the Tracey Porter interception. Lately it seems our D focuses on stopping abig play rather than making one.

Still, we finished in the top 8, meaning one of the top 25% of the league. And our future looks bright with Sproles and Graham. I just feel like our D needs to step up.

10:54AM - More Skyrim

Okay, so I’ve been playing for a while now. My character is 16th level.

I went for a "tank" build – focus on having lots of health, heavy armour, and "board and sword" – shield and one handed weapon. I chose Redguard for his race, based almost entirely on how they look. In hindsight, I should probably have gone with Nord – they’re similarly physically focused, but the Nords have a Speech bonus which could have been very useful. For those who haven’t played, Redguard are kind of brown skinned dark haired, while Nords are Viking-esque.

More on gameplay: I struggled for a while to get use to the Left mouse button being my right hand (weapon), and the right mouse button being my left hand (shield). I can understand the logic (left mouse is the more frequently used click for right handed people, and all characters in Skyrim and right handed, so dominant hand = dominant command), but my brain took a while to click. Still, it wasn’t a bad thing that I kept blocking when I meant to swing...

The detail in the game world continues to astound me. Not only do they have food, but it’s nothing like simple "rations – stuff you find is carrots, potatoes, cabbages, leeks, etc. You can go out and hunt deer, rabbit, or kill domestic chickens and cows (although watch out if they belong to someone else, you’ll end up in trouble with the law) for their meat. Then you find a cooking pot, mingle your ingredients to get new food. As I mentioned to people on the weekend, I care far more about cooking in Skyrim than I do in real life. Food doubles as a source of healing (with traditional healing potions). Give me some Vegetable soup any day (restores 720 health over 720 seconds).

Of course, with all that detail you become much more picky. No longer are loot drops a case of "grab everything", now you have to be selective. Yes, I’ll take his armour, but I won’t bother with his 2gp shoes or his 1gp hat. I’ve taken to applying a 10:1 ration in terms of value to weight. So, I’ll take someone’s Hide Bracers (10gp, 1lb), but leave their Iron Axe (15gp, 14lbs). Otherwise you just get weighed down too quickly – each enemy would have at least 50lbs of gear, and you can only carry ~300lbs (including your own stuff). Travel back to the cities would just take forever.

Finally, the skill system is pretty interesting. You only increase your skills when you use them, and your skill increases drive your level increases. I’m not sure how many you need, but for example at 1st level you might need to increase 3 skills by 1, while at later levels you might need to increase 16. You can increase a skill multiple times per level. And when you level you get perks (similar to feats / powers) as well as a choice of health, magika or stamina increase. You can pay for training as well to help you level.

So I’m in a situation where my 1 handed weapon skill is pretty high (51), far outstripping most of my other skills (mid 30’s for other combat skills, mid 20’s for other non-magic skills, teens for magic skills), purely because I practise the old mantra that the best defence is a good offence.

12:31PM - Skyrim (beginning)

So, I picked up Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim today (for the PC). And I figure I'll share my thoughts as I play through it.

I've played about an hour at this point. My first thoughts are it's very pretty.

However, I find the controls are a little jerky - I find it difficult to turn left and right using the mouse but move forward using the keyboard (having come from Dragon Age, where you turn and move with the keyboard).

Also I'm not convinced I've actually hit anything in combat yet.

Plenty of loot early on though - I seem to be loaded to the gills.

2:48PM - Remembering Aliens LARPs (part 3)

The series concluded with Aliens: Apocalypse in 1999. The game occurred at Trentham Racecourse, with interior and exterior usage. Finally set on Earth, the game reflected the world after Aliens had been introduced and the apocalypse that caused. The players took on the role of survivors, heeding a call to come to Sanctuary to try and create a new society.

On the Friday night we had people arriving at the complex in character. We had set up a defendable perimeter, and had some army guys standing there checking people as they came in. I had set up a scanner device (a cardboard tube with a torch inside and a slit cut down it so it glowed, attached to a laptop) where we were checking people as they arrived to ensure they weren’t “infected”.

We had set up an awesome set piece where Vic Johns had a chest-burster start to erupt. I hit a button on the laptop, and the scan result changed from a “clean” result to an ‘infected” one. Vic was ushered aside, getting several odd looks from people and whispered concerns. Then she started to convulse, and her white top was suddenly stained with blood. The army guys (who, aside from me, where unaware this was meant to be happening) raced to “put her down” – in the process one of the wooden palettes that we were using as part of the barricade fell in Vic (and we were very lucky she wasn’t badly injured!). I remember Leon being a smartgunner, and standing somewhere with a good line of fire that would allow him to mow down the entire crowd if necessary.

There were patrols that people had to help out with, generally involving one army guy and a bunch of volunteers. I recall that we had a bunch of Aliens masks, and at some point aliens started to grab people on patrol. Then they started to get closer to the compound.

The rules were that if an Alien grabbed you, you were dead. Which, to be fair, was fairly in line with the movies. I remember someone opening a door at one stage, sticking their head out to check for aliens, and an Alien behind the door grabbing them and dragging them out. Some really great scary moments!

The finale of the game involved a new type of alien, a huge tentacled blob that commanded the Aliens and was trying to negotiate a truce of sorts with the humans. I recall that it was effectively a huge puppet of some sort, with a person each working the arms.

The old website is still up, but the attached files don’t seem to work:
http://www.apocalypse.gen.nz/apocalypse/index.html

12:13PM - Remembering Aliens LARPs (part 2)

Aliens: Fury (1997) was the second in the trilogy, and the first to incorporate elements of LARP.

It was played at the Tory Street flat above the Tile Warehouse, which Matt White lived in at the time. It had a huge long warehouse-esque living room, which we somehow partitioned off with black fabric into areas.

The setting was a space station again maybe? Or a moon base or something. I recall there were scientists and prisoners – I think it was some type of scientific research place that was experimenting on humans, particularly with regards to breeding Aliens. Anyone who saw the movie Aliens: Resurrection, let’s just say mr_orgue thought of it first.

I was GM’ing the station support guys – from memory a bunch of security guards, a corporate boss, and a janitor (played by Leon I think, based liberally on Willy the Janitor from the Simpsons). I think there were two groups of scientists, the prisoners, and a secret group of eco-terrorists. I remember the eco-terroists gathered at a different location on the Friday night and roleplayed their ship approaching the station. I recall taking great pleasure in terrorising James Goldsmith.

As mentioned in the comments to my previous post, there were only a few surviros who (I think) fled on the Eco-terrorists spaceship. Potentially with an alien on board?

3:03PM - Remembering Aliens LARPs

Thinking about a Warhammer 40k LARP got me thinking about the other Sci-Fi LARP’s I had been involved with in the past.

During the 90’s mr_orgue (and co) ran a trilogy of very successful Aliens weekends.

The first was called Aliens: Gametime. It was played out at Campbell’s flat in Mirimar and might have had 30 players? I recall it was more tabletop than LARP. Set on a space station orbiting above a distant planet, I remember that the station mined water from the planet below by cutting huge chunks of ice from the polar caps and catapulting them into space. I remember svendlemaus coming up with that concept, as it was something he had read somewhere. I remember jarrattgray played a racecar driver of some sort. I remember I played a black synthetic called Washington, who was eventually reprogrammed to overcome his inability to kill. I have a vague recollection that the game ended with the last 3 living survivors trying to kill each other on an escaping ship.

(To be continued)

1:16PM - Better late than never...

The poster I put together for "Junk" is now up at www.makemymovie.co.nz.

12:35PM - NFL update

So, the Saints were 4-1 coming into today. After the opening day loss to the Green bay Packers, they reeled off 4 wins in a row against the Bears, Texans, Jags and Panthers. The Bears and Jags games were strong wins (30-13 and 23-10), the Texans and Panthers less so (40-33, 30-27).

Then today we have another divisional rival in the Bucs. And we lost 26-20. Drew Brees threw 3 Interceptions.

The problem in my mind is the Saints are having to play too much catch up football. Meaning relying too much on Brees throwing it, and ahving increased pressure on him. Brees has thrown 8 interceptions through 6 games, so is on pace for 21 for the season. Last season is was 22. It's tough to win games when you loose the turnover battle, and we're losing those battles.

Another reason we're throwing so much is that our running game isn't working well either. We had 70 yards rushing today (as compared to 383 in the air), and 20 of that was from Brees.

Basically, our defence is what's worrying me.

Oh well, 4-2 is still not a bad start. But we have a long way to go.

2:22PM - NFL week 1

Week 1 of the NFL season is just about in the bag.

The Saints opened up on the Thursday night game against the reigning champion Green Bay Packers. After allowing a TD on the opening drive (which I think the commentators said we didn’t do all of last year), we proceeded to fumble the ball within the first couple of plays and allow another TD. Down 14-0, it was an uphill battle for the entire game. We ended up losing 42-34.

The big concern for me was our defence. GB mercilessly picked on Patrick Robinson, our second year cornerback, and he struggled all night. Overall cornerback is the position I’m most concerned about in our D. Skill wise, I was concerned about the tackles we missed, and our inability to force any turnovers. In 2009 our D thrived by forcing turnovers, if we want to return to the Superbowl then we need that back.

I’d be much more concerned if it wasn’t for the fact that every other team in the NFC South lost their opening game. The Buccaneers fell to the Detroit Lions of all teams (who might make the jump this year…). The falcons got blitzed 30-12 by the Bears, and the Panthers lost 28-21 to the Cardinals.

In other results, the Texans (who I liked the look of in preseason) comfortably beat the Colts who were missing Peyton Manning. And the Redskins shocked the Giants with a 28-14 win.

10:31AM - Current Earworm

"Somebody That I Used To Know"
(feat. Kimbra)

[Gotye:]
Now and then I think of when we were together
Like when you said you felt so happy you could die
Told myself that you were right for me
But felt so lonely in your company
But that was love and it's an ache I still remember

You can get addicted to a certain kind of sadness
Like resignation to the end, always the end
So when we found that we could not make sense
Well you said that we would still be friends
But I'll admit that I was glad that it was over

But you didn't have to cut me off
Make out like it never happened and that we were nothing
And I don't even need your love
But you treat me like a stranger and that feels so rough
No you didn't have to stoop so low
Have your friends collect your records and then change your number
I guess that I don't need that though
Now you're just somebody that I used to know
( Read more... )

1:53PM - THE TV ALPHABET: C is for Castle

Has it really been 6 weeks since my last TV Alphabet update? Man, time has flown.

Castle

Castle is a current police procedural show showing on TV One over here, and produced by ABC in the States.

The show stars Nathan Fillion as Rick Castle, a crime writer who (due to his friendship with the Mayor) gets to ride along with New York’s finest as inspiration for his novels. Stana Katic plays Detective Kate Beckett, Castle's muse, foil, and would be love interest.

How does Castle win me over? I mean, it's a police procedural show that follows many of the tenets of that genre (and there have been many good ones who have done this to death - Law and Order, for example).

Well, there's Fillion, who oozes charisma and nails the role of Castle. He has boyish charm, wit, and a great sense of humour.

There's the sexual tension between Castle and Beckett, which manages to play out the whole "will they / won't they" tease for everything it's worth. I mean, they have to kiss to fool a guard at a nightclub that they're just a bunch of drunk party-goers. They have to snuggle together for body warmth when stuck in a freezer. The last episode I saw they share this long lingering glance after Castle confessed to being jealous of the time Beckett had spent with another writer. It's money.

Then there's all the in jokes. The episode where Castle dresses for halloween as a "Space Cowboy" - donning his Malcolm Renolds costume from Firefly (to which his daughter asks "didn't you wear that 5 years ago"). There's the episode where they find a dead guy with vampire fangs and Castle says "looks like Buffy's visited the Big Apple" (referencing Fillion's role in Buffy the Vampire Slayer). Oh wait, they were THE SAME EPISODE (season 2, episode 6, my personal favourite).

Good supporting actors and actresses as well.

All I know is this. I go out of my way to watch Castle on Monday nights. And when it clashes with other things, I watch it on TVNZ on Demand within the next few days.

My question is - where does it go to from here? Castle and Beckett must almost be at the point of getting together, there's got to be something that forces them apart (like at the end of season 2 where Castle ran off with his ex-wife), or they have to change the dynamic somehow.

Also rans: Chuck, because of Adam Baldwin (another Firefly alum) and the hot blonde girl. But I've never bothered to really watch it, I find comedy and spy are genre's that don't really mix well for me.

3:31PM - Harry Potter 7a

Does anyone have it on DVD? If so, can I borrow before next Friday?

11:21PM - Our 48 Hour Film Contest entry

I posted this on Facebook and Twitter, so apologies to those who have already seen it there. Here is the entry we made for the Wellington V 48 Hour Film Contest.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D_7srtthUJk

4:32PM - THE TV ALPHABET: B is for Blakes 7

Blakes 7

Blakes 7 was in iconic BBC Sci-Fi show from the 70's, which played in NZ during my childhood and was repeated in my teenage years (I recall recording episodes on VHS tapes, and woe betide my siblings if they changed the channel and I somehow missed an episode). As a kid I was into all the Sci-Fi TV I could get (Star Trek, the original Battlestar Galactica, Buck Rodgers in the 25th century, etc.), linking back to my love of Star Wars.

The show was about a group of escaped criminals led by Roj Blake, on the run from the totalitarian Galactica Federation. Having stumbled onto a high tech alien spacecraft (the Liberator), Roj and his band of merry men (and women) travel around the galaxy fighting injustices and trying to overthrow the oppressive Federation regime.

I think part of what attracted me to the show initially was the similarities with Star Wars (the Federation had many similarities to the Empire: faceless soldiers, a ruthless leader, their black leather clad half-machine enforcer, etc.). That, and the characters. While Blake was the idealistic hero, his crew were anything but. Kerr Avon, the arrogant genius who was always on the lookout for his own interests. Villa Restal, the cowardly thief. There were others, but those two were my favourites. I think it was Blakes 7 that first introduced me to the concept of the reluctant hero / the anti-hero, a protagonist without the pure moral fibre of a Luke Skywalker.

Blakes 7 ran for 4 seasons. The first two kept basically the same core crew (Blake, Avon, Villa, Jenna, Gan, Kelly, Zen) although Orac probably came to be counted as 1 of the 7 after Gan's death. Season 3 saw Blake and Jenna leave (how many shows can remove their signature character and continue?), replaced on the Liberator by new characters Travis and Dayna. At the end of Season 3 the show thought it was being cancelled, and the Liberator was destroyed, only to have a new season approved. So season 4 featured a new ship (The Scorpio) and saw Cally replaced by Soolin.

As was typical at that time, the show is very episodic – one episode will show an encounter with a strange alien species, while the next will be dealing with the Federation, without a lot of continuity. I recall one episode when they mentioned a council of Federation Governors who had never been heard of before, and were never heard of again.

But on their shoestring budget they managed to weave some gold. The dialogue was cutting, with Avon's retorts or Villa's self deprecation being standouts. ("Easy! I hate personal violence, especially when I'm the person"). Although the number of scenes shot at old quarrys or abandoned factories (aka "High Security Instalations") was amusing.

One of the greatest things for me was the ending. The good guys faced overwhelming odds, and eventually they lost. The final shot – Avon standing over Blake's dead body, gun in hand, surrounded by Federation Stormtroopers. The screen goes black you hear guns fire, roll credits. Magic.

The other two shows which really pushed Blacks 7 for that top spot were Buffy the Vampire Slayer and the reimaged Battlestar Galactica. Both were game changers, and I own most of both on DVD.

Also rans: Breaking Bad, Babylon 5. If I can't be bothered to get every episode I can and watch it, then you don't crack my top 3 for B.

Also Also rans (when I checked my DVD collection at home): Burn Notice. I really like Burn Notice. Not the least because it's set in Miami. And Big Bang Theory. There are lots of good series that start with B.

1:29PM - THE TV ALPHABET: A is for Alias

So, I've been thinking about doing this for some time. As many readers may know, I'm a huge TV fan, and tend to digest entire series in a weekend. So I thought I'd do a TV alphabet, go through each letter of the alphabet and identify my favourite TV show that started with that letter.

Alias
Alias is a show I watched well after it's original air date. I think I picked up the first season on DVD for cheap, and it was all over from there.

The show follows Sydney Bristow, a secret agent played by Jennifer Garner. Pretty early on Bristow discovers the agency she's working for (SD-6) isn't all it's cracked up to be, and she ends up living a double-double life. Yeah, I loves me some Jennifer Garner, she ticks all the "girl next door" boxes, so that was certainly part of what kept me coming back for more. But there was more to it that that.

It was created by JJ Abrams, creator of LOST, so it's not surprising that in later series it developed it's own fascinating mythology around Rambaldi, a fictional renaissance inventor who was a combination of Leonardo Da Vinci and
Nostradamus, having designed incredible devices and predicted the future with uncanny precision. Plus the stories featured plenty of missions to exotic locations and fantastical cover stories that mirrored Mission: Impossible.

The show featured a number of awesome actors - Bradley Cooper (The Hangover) made his first big break here, and David Anders as the villainous Julian Sark was awesome.

Finally, Jack Bristow (played by Victor Garber) finishes 2nd (behind Jason Bourne) in terms of fictional real world characters I would want to rescue me if I was ever kidnapped / about to be murdered.

Other series worth mentioning: Angel, the A-Team.

Up next: The very difficult letter B.

8:27PM - Where is my mind?

Oooooo Oooooo.

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11:53PM - NBA Finals

Today was one of the greatest comebacks in NBA Finals history. The Dallas Mavericks were down by 15, went on a 17-2 run to tie the game at 90 with a minute remaining. Interestingly, of that 17 it was Terry with 8, Nowitzki 4, Kidd 3 and Marion 2.

Then Nowitzki iced it with the last 5 points for the Mavs, winning 95-93.

THE GERMANS HAVE THE PRECISION ENGINEERING, YOU CANNOT STOP ZE GERMANS!

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